even at my best...

current favorite artist is matt nathanson. love him.

lately i'm questioning more and more about my lack of commitment. not, like, commitment in a serious way--like to living or to Christ or something....just my ability to make commitments and follow through. like, for instance--i have no problem at all making a commitment to doing something, or a role on leadership, or a job, or even friends...but there comes a time when i lose trust in others, and in myself, and i honestly don't know that i could ever be involved with anyone in a relationship capacity because i just can't commit. i can't fathom the idea. part of it's control, i guess. these thoughts are so random.

"and you hold me in your arms
and all that i can see is my future in your hands
and all that i can feel is how long ever after is
it's all that i can do, just to be with you, just to be with you

in your wedding dress, to have and hold
even at my best, i want to let go..."
~matt nathanson